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66 Creating a Group Coaching Program with Bakar Bey

66: Creating a Group Coaching Program with Bakar Bey

In this episode of The Community Strategy Podcast, Coach Bakar Bey aka “coach Bey” shares his journey creating, Habit 2 Greatness, an Accountability+ Coaching program. 

He’s a passionate, accountable, and benevolent leader who’s committed to helping entrepreneurs and service professionals develop foundational life skills. 

His coaching program guides them out of personal and professional negligence and into more fulfilling lives, in less time, while also empowering them to make every moment count.

Coach Bey says he helps clients to elevate into the highest expressions of themselves. 

He is also a published author, keynote speaker, spoken word poet, engineer, educator, financial advocate, and enterprising entrepreneur. 

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Show Notes

3:12: Bakar starts with what he’s excited and passionate about in 2022:  Living peacefully and fulfilled by putting himself first. 

8:15: Deb and Bakar talk about resources like Profit First and Miracle Morning. Bakar coaches by modeling, introducing clients to things he does himself.

14:29: Starting in a mastermind with his family, Bakar discovered the benefits of a support system to help with individual goals. He jumped into a community and started hosting accountability, noticing people were drawn to it.   

19:42: Bakar discusses launching his program at the end of February, including beta testing his three-month course with a small group.

28:58: Deb and Bakar point out the beauty of facilitating a community where people are safe and comfortable to be vulnerable. 

35:52: Bakar turns the tables and asks Deb about any funny moments along her journey. They discuss fun being an intentional part of life. 

43:19: Bakar explains where you can best contact him on any social media platform.

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Deb Schell is the Creator of Find Calm Here LLC — As a community strategist, she helps female entrepreneurs and executives find calm in building, launching, and growing paid online communities. 

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Episode Transcript

Welcome to the community strategy podcast. I’m your host, Deb Schell on this podcast. I share conversations with leaders of purpose-driven, private paid online communities that bring together like-minded members for transformation to better their life, career relationships, and well-being. As a community strategist, I help entrepreneurs build launch, and grow online page communities on mighty networks and to learn more about working with me. Please visit my website, find calm here dot com. That’s F I N D C A L M E H E R E dot com. I help entrepreneurs find calm in the process of launching an online community. So check that out please, uh in partnership with the Community Leaders Institute, I’m thrilled to announce an exclusive special discount on their upcoming clicks uh event, which is going to take place in Memphis on April 4th through the fifth at the resident convention center in Memphis Tennessee.

If you register for the event and book a ticket, You’ll receive $200 off your ticket by entering code Deb DB 200 200 at checkout. And you can go to clicks event CLIX event dot com or look at the show notes and there will be a link there for you to click and sign up for clicks. That’s really cool. I want to ask you, do you have a strategy question that you are struggling with something, a challenge? Uh if you do, I want to start answering some questions uh through uh the podcast. It’s a new thing I want to try. So please shoot me an email at Deb at Find Calm Here dot com and I will review any questions I get in the next episode, I will add an answer section for any questions that I do get once I get some. To send an email to Deb at fine calm here dot com and I hope you enjoyed this episode. I am so excited to introduce today’s guest uh Bart, I didn’t even ask you, that’s all I got all these tech issues.

Is it, is it bob barker back our coach bicarb The carb, thank you. Coach Carr Bay, we can call him Coach Bay is the creator and foundational of the foundational life coaching practice habit to greatness and accountability and coaching program and he’s passionate about keeping people accountable I guess. And but nonviolent leaders who are committed to helping entrepreneurs and service professionals develop foundational life skills, to guide them out of personal and professional neglect into more fulfilling lives in less time, and empower them to make every moment count. He helps his clients to elevate into their highest expressions of themselves. And he’s also a published author, keynote speaker, spoken word, poet, engineer, educator, financial advocate, and enterprising entrepreneur. Welcome to the Fine Con Here strategy community strategy podcast. Oh, thank you, dad.

It’s been a while since I’ve worn all the hats right, Yes, all of those hats, it’s so amazing that you have so much background. Yeah, so tell me a little about so I met you during a networking event, but like to share a little bit about it, I know I just read some things here, but what are you really excited and passionate about in 2022? Well, one of the things I’m really passionate about is it’s continuing to gain even more and more control and ownership of my life and showing others how to really live peacefully, fulfilled joyfully and now each day I’m excited about modeling it more than anything. That’s what really gets me excited. Oh, I am so connecting with that because that is a big part of it, that’s the foundation of why I started feeling calm here. Um I love what, what, what does that mean to you? Like how how do you do those things? Tell me a little bit more about that. So I would say I’ve been very much an energy conservationist most of my life, what does that mean?

I like to manage my energy, I don’t like to work too hard if I can use my brain to get things done before I have to put my body, you know, too crazy amounts of work, I’m going to use my brain first. And so it really just grew over time by developing self-awareness, understanding, you know what it felt like to be burned out, you know, to some of my college years when I had to pull all-nighters. I think I remember a time I was working on a project and I probably slept about six hours over 11 days and I said I never want to feel like this ever again in my life. The project was a, was a hit, it was the first place prize, but I, I didn’t want to have to put that level of energy into it and I realized man, if I could do a little bit every day, small bites, small chunks and manage, you know, my rest, my peace, my activity, you know, the things that are most important to me, I actually did an assessment with one of my coaches just last year and I’m happy to report that 80% of my day or more is dedicated to tasks and um activities that are important to my life, it sounds like it’s really helpful.

Absolutely. Um living by the theme of small changes that make great results. So even my word for this year is all about practice. You know, I pulled myself or put myself in a number of different reactions to learn a lot about, you know, growing my coaching business, uh, been in business before, but never really one that had my name, my face, my stamp on it. And so this year I realized, okay, I understand a bit of what I want to do now, I need to really dial into the day to day activities and just create a new habit of practicing those things that matter most, you know, so whether it’s connecting with people, you know, prayer and meditation in the day exercise, you know, I have a whole three hour morning routine that starts my day and I was like, he’s got to have a morning routine, I’m sure. Absolutes, absolutely. It’s probably about 3-4 hours um a focused time with taking care of myself. I called him I was a move meditate and grow.

But it’s really built around the idea of, you know, paying myself first. That’s really what I got out of it is, you know, spend a lot of time doing what I thought others wanted for me to do. You know, parents and advisors and teachers and instructors and coaches, you know, for a long time, you know, listening to see if their plans for me, we’re going to work out the way that I imagined my plans for me working out and ultimately, um I really found men to stay true to myself to really be fulfilled and be happy. I had to approach life by giving because I’m I’m truly benevolent. Like I would give the rest of my life, you know, for those who want to succeed with those who want to grow, be better, you know, improve themselves in their lives, you know, everything you’re having me I’m willing to give and so I realized I had to give myself a little bit of that first in order to be able to sustain it long term. So I live by pay myself 1st. That’s what we talked about. So we were in a networking session together and we talked about, um, I was in a financial, it was a financial conversation and we were talking about the book profit first that I just started reading and you were talking about reading, right?

Oh yeah, absolutely. And it’s fascinating to me how so many people live their lives and don’t put themselves first. It’s everything. And then like at the end of the day, oh, maybe I have time for some self-care and so starting the day and, and I really truly believe that it’s the foundation that we should, um, first take care of ourselves. Like I believe in the same philosophy and I started with um, building up a morning routine. I don’t know if you’re familiar with how L rods book the miracle morning? Yes, I haven’t had a chance to read it yet, but I’ve had some exposure to the ideas. Yeah, but you have a 3-hour morning routine. And is that, so is that something you work with with your clients, or is this just for you? And then you’re thinking of how you can, you can support clients in that way when your coach when you’re coaching? So a lot of what I do share with my clients are things that I can model, right? Because I, I truly do believe in, you know, leading from experience, you can gain a lot of experience from observing, but it’s not the same like you can watch somebody swim, but it won’t teach you how to do it.

And so, you know, my, my 3-hour morning routine actually starts the night before, you know, I think the first thing I put on my calendar every week is rest. And so the things that I know that have worked for me, I introduced them, exposed my clients, those that work with to them, and let them really explore what’s going to work for them as well. Some people need more rest than I do. Some people, you know, they can make it off less rest. Others, they like to have a front-loaded day, others get their boost, you know, midday or to the end of the day. So being mindful and self-aware of when those peaks and valleys are, can really help individuals to tailor their day two, what works best for them, I can tell you for me to 30 in the afternoon, I’m shutting it down for about a half hour or so, like, that has just been in me for, I don’t know how long it even got in the way of me working and sometimes I would just get exhausted, no amount of lunch or anything with, keep me awake unless I was, you know, actively moving around or teaching or working with people and uh that’s one of the things that kind of led me into this path, is working with people every day.

Yeah, that sounds, it sounds so similar to like some of the things I had worked with um in my own life and what I work with the clients is how do you find calm and balance and, and have, you know, I didn’t leave my corporate job to now drive myself crazy working 80 hours a week, but that somehow I fell into that like in 2020 I’m like okay now, instead of working 40 hours a week, I’m actually working like two jobs And I’m working, you know, 12 hours a day and then not taking care of myself. And before that, I had actually had a really, I guess three-hour morning routine where I did all this stuff before I went to work and so now I’m learning, it’s a new balance about being an entrepreneur and balancing that with like, okay, I don’t need to spend all of this time and do all of these things at once in small batches, it kind of a thing, but I also um you really want to implement the self care and I think it’s a great strategy and and like how you’re helping people to really um putting not only important on that but and prioritizing it, but also like making it customized for them for their schedule because I think that’s a big challenge because people would hear three hours more than routine and be like I don’t have three hours and then you have to tell them what you do, but you’re using it in different ways and you know what only about an hour to an hour and a half of that is personal time.

You know, what’s worked for me is and I, I’ve needed to set an appointment early with my dad. So you know, part of the accountability community that I volunteer with and that starts at six a.m. You know, here on the east coast. And so that’s my first appointment of the day after my appointment with my creator, my appointment with my fitness coach. You know, whether it’s an app that I’m using or you know, my partner that I work out with. Oh, but I realized that man, I’m never, I’m the type of person who doesn’t like to miss appointments. I like to be early on time and prompt. You know, there’s something been conditioned to me since a child. So I’ve used that to my advantage now to set appointments early in my day to get the things done that are important to me that is most meaningful and it really helps on the back end of the day when I don’t feel guilty about procrastinating through the day on things that I don’t like to get done, they’re already out of the way and it’s giving me, you know momentum and gives me a boost the energy and then I can, you know, plan the more quote unquote fun activities because I’m naturally drawn to working with people, you know, the more I can frontal actually I even tutor now recreational e you know, I get paid to do it, but I enjoy just helping young people out and I know that you know, not everybody has that that type of support or assistance, you know, throughout the day, so it’s one of the areas where, you know, I imagine when I have Children that age I’m gonna be spending that time doing that anyway, so it’s something that I’ve built into the way ahead of schedule.

Yeah, yeah, and and again it’s more about um you know, just trying new things and and implementing them in your life a little bit at a time and I was like, it’s a good transition to have as far as okay, well bringing us back to community and and talking about like how do you bring people together in a in a in a coaching situation or create that accountability and how communities can really be supportive in coaching and accountability. I don’t know if that’s something um that you could share a little bit more about with what you do with your coaching program. Absolutely. So for me it really it started with a a mastermind community, I started with my brother in law and my sister, you know, all of us entrepreneurs in slightly different spaces but realized especially pre pandemic that we needed a little bit of a support system to help us in our own individual goals, we met about, you know every other week, but I realized the accountability that I had with them was what I needed every day and you know, fast forward to a year later, found an opportunity to just start, I just jumped into a community and started hosting or holding accountability and a conference setting actually and people were drawn to it, people realized, hey, I need this, you know, I was showing up the same way I did for myself in the mornings in the evenings to you know, set my day or get my day started and then set the agenda for the next day in the evenings and as I saw people were drawn to it, I realized this is something that I could really grow with, this is something that’s um going to stretch and challenge me, but it also fits so neatly into how I already operate my life, that I could really bring some added value to those who may not even are aware that they can be accountable in community by being around other people who are modeling, you know, personal responsibility?

Yeah, it’s so interesting. Um so tell me a little bit more about how that got started um was it just you meeting with like your, your family members and close friends or how did you get the word out about this? So it started like I said with the mastermind group meeting every other week with, you know, my family and us talking about businesses and ways to get ourselves, you know, moving in the direction that we wanted to and then had the opportunity, I joined a conference, online virtual conference and they, you know, had little rooms, little, I ain’t gonna say little rooms, but there were different groups, you know, topics that people could come together and just kind of discuss and explore. And I just started holding or hosting, you know, accountability calls during the conference, during a virtual conference and um utilize really invited anyone who wanted to show up, right? Because I knew in my mind, hey, how long do I want to keep this going? But um you know, dozens, dozens, if not a couple of 100 people were showing up regularly.

That’s amazing from there. Just build. I realized, okay, the rest once this conference and it was like three months over virtual. Um but once it ended, it was really after about a month I realized I’m gonna have to figure out a way to take this to market alright without, you know, this nice neat group of people that are already, you know, looking for the same kind of things that I’m looking for. And so that’s, that’s really been one of them, I think the most exciting or enjoyable journey is figuring out who and where to share my voice with who and where to share that voice and that experience and, you know, people have been trickling in as they’re getting exposed to realize a lot of people don’t have the kind of exposure to know what it’s like. Um you know, there’s a negative connotation around accountability. You know, I actually have a client, one of my, one of my best clients is said to me from the beginning, I didn’t think that I needed somebody to help me do the things I said I was going to do for myself, just didn’t believe that they needed accountability until they saw what it looked like from me.

And it’s like, no, it’s not for me, it’s showing up for you. So for me, it’s just creating a safe space for people to show up for themselves, share their challenges, share their struggles, but most importantly share their successes day today and create a winning habit or create, you know, successful habits in their day to day life so that they’re focusing on the progress that they’re making instead of feeling Yeah, and focusing on the things that they maybe feel like they’re not doing and that society is, you know, telling them that they’re not doing. So really helping people just dial in on what do they want, what do they want their days to look like, what do they want their life to look like and what are the small things that they can do daily in order to just build, build, build it up. Yeah. So many things there you were talking about. So the, I love the habit to greatness is, is a great name of this program and it’s just, you know, that is how you create great habits that could take you to great places, right? It’s kind of um an amazing concept.

Yeah, the other thing I was thinking of is um so you were talking about like you were meeting with these other um, and then you did this amazing conference, and then so now you’re branching out to start this habits for greatness program and you said um where and when? So have you launched something yet or is that still something you’re working on as far as the actual program? So um the program actually, yeah, it went went live at the end of february um once I realized that there was, there was a demand, there were people who were getting a lot of value um I started relieving teaching, you know how to master yourself and your habits put together like a three month course, even had a beta group that went all the way through that with me and from there, it helped me to understand the value of what I was bringing, had a huge, huge, huge vision and I just heard recently, you know that we often overestimate what we can do in a year, but underestimate what we can do in a decade. So I have, you know, in my mind, this 10-year plan that’s coming together.

But I realized I have to to focus in on what is what is needed today in day today. And so um it’s it was really powerful having the people in the community who were showing up for themselves as well as for the others in the community. I think that was one of the beautiful things that came out is realizing that once the people started showing up together, you know, these relationships form, you know, for them to be really open to be ah free. You know, in this really nonjudgmental space and the community just kind of came together like a family. And so um it was it was exciting for me to be able to see how that accountability network began to form and and I I live by the code is you know, one accountability partner is good But if something happens to them, you’re back at Square one. So I believe in, you know creating those not just partners but a true network of people who know your goals who care about you enough to support you and what it is that you want to do and not going to attempt to push their own agendas on you but really just ask important questions that will help you clarify where you’re going and to stick to it consistently.

There’s a difference between critique and criticism, right? People get advice-giving versus um offering a space um for people to speak without um judgment and things and that’s part of community building and part of creating um connection with people inside an online space or in-person space um is creating that and telling them here’s what we do and here’s um you know some great ways to connect and bring them together and structures Super important because um not only the structure of the community and like the times that you meet and everything, but just like the agreements between the people, here’s what I’m able to do to show up and I want to be accountable or help for this. And um I think that’s really helpful to have frameworks around that because I was in Masterminds and you know, it could have been structured better. I think it would have gone a lot in some of the first masterminds I was in um and some of them fell apart maybe like after a while because we just kind of went in different directions with stuff.

But when you get another mastermind that I was in which then became the mighty mastermind we were all on the same journey but we were all in different places have different focuses. But then as we like supported each other, it didn’t matter like you know if we were working on the exact same thing or not. It was still just a matter of we wanted to support each other without that critique. Like giving helpful um suggestions versus like criticizing, which is what you get, like, if you put things on social media, you’ll get all kinds of responses right? If you have an idea, it could be like, yeah, this is awesome dev and other things can be like, um, this this is the problem dada dada, like, they can give you all kinds of their opinion if you’ve had on social media, but when you have an idea, especially in the early stages of life business, you you have lots of ideas and all of these things and their components and you’re saying about, I have a vision right for 10 years from now or five years from now, but what’s really important is, okay, well, what’s gonna happen next week, what’s going to happen tomorrow?

Like how am I going to progress? And so you have to like stage it. There’s a there’s a book also, that’s 12 weeks, 12 weeks in a year. It talks about how all week you’re right, So how much can you get done? You can get done so much more than you can get done in a year. If you use that book of the structure of a framework that they teach around, like how to structure out your time so that you’re making it most efficient for the Things that you want to focus on in that three months and that 12 weeks vs like looking at, okay, the whole year, I want to do all these things, but then life gets in the way, right, right. That’s actually one of the frameworks we use to help people condense the timeframe. One of the things I’ve learned in life, if you give yourself a year, it’ll take a year. If you give yourself three months, hey, you could, you could really surprise yourself what you can accomplish in that timeframe. Um so with my accountability community, we focus on, you know, the small elements of time, you know, starting with a day, what can you do in a day, Alright, And build that out too Well, what can you do in a week, I’m very unassuming, so when I invite people into the community, there’s usually, you know, I’m looking to see how long can you keep up what works for you, right.

I knew for myself, I was going to show up for at least nine months, whether nobody else did or not and the whole time I’m watching those that are, you know, part of the community to see who else is going to last that long because I know life is gonna gonna come at you and if you haven’t built the habit of really persevering and working through and um I know even for me, there were times where I would, I would isolate myself or I would fade when I’m working through what my challenges are, But sometimes those are the times you really need to step up into a community in order to receive support, encouragement, inspiration, to keep moving your right there at a breakthrough. But it seems to be overwhelming for what you believe you’re capable at the time. And so I really, really enjoyed the process of just learning with people about themselves about what they’re capable of, how well they can show up and you know, whether they need to clear some things off their plate or shift their focus entirely, but ultimately helping them to, to be present in every single day for the rest of their life.

Yeah, Yeah. And just vulnerability is so hard sometimes, um, you know, to share challenging moments of our lives or things that you’re going through that are really emotional or upsetting or frustrating or stressful. Um it’s really hard sometimes for, for my community members or other community that I’m in and myself actually um with the community I’m in, you know, when you’re in that moment, but that’s the moment that you’re right. It’s, it’s really important. Like that’s the moment you really want to um say hey, and it’s, it’s a little bit about asking for a little help. Like, hey, I’m really struggling or here’s the situation. Um, but when you create that connection with people over time. Like there’s a group that I’m in, that there’s a handful of us that we’ve been meeting in accountability call every week since June of last year January, we’re recording now and so about six months. We’ve been meeting every single week and I committed to showing up because I knew I needed to prioritize my mental health and this group was helping me do that as a support group and the other people there then just followed in line and said, yeah, I want to show up for you and I want to show up for myself and then over time, you know, I didn’t share these like major life changes that were happening that were like super emotional when they were happening over the last six months, but like as things happened, I started to open up a little bit more and a little bit more and then felt like I really need to share this with people because maybe they can give me some support or feedback or help.

It was really last year was really personally me learning that I needed to just ask for help and it became a transformational. That group actually helped me pivot my entire life and into where it is today. So community is something that’s so massively um transformational and and massively important. Um I think right now since we’re in such a mental health crisis for one thing, um it’s where you really find your family when you maybe you don’t either, you don’t maybe have the ability to connect with your family or um you know, or you don’t have a family or there are other factors that are, you don’t feel like you have a safe space to talk about these things. That’s the that’s when community is like so powerful, right? Oh, absolutely. And you know, some of the most beautiful moments came from others feeling comfortable enough two to be vulnerable, right? Really creating that safe space.

It took me, I mean years took me years to be comfortable. I’m sharing those vulnerable stories of myself, but I found that it also gave others permission and the way that community like rallied around people going through what they were going through. Um it was it was better than anything I could have done in my own coaching. You know, I’m a huge empathetic, but I realized I’m also very much, you know, future focus, you know, present and future focus. And so at times, it can be difficult for me to sit and empathize for an extended period of time about what someone is going through because my mind naturally begins to work on how do I move through it. But a couple of lessons that I did learn just being around, you know, those who understood their emotions a lot better than I did earlier in my life, really taught me that I had to sit with the emotions to understand them, why they’re happening, why I’m feeling them and that, you know, all feelings are valid, right?

We have the power to choose what we feel. Um but we also have a responsibility not to become a prisoner to them as well and it’s just it’s really freeing to be in a space where people can release those negative feelings that have been holding on to them for so long and be able to facilitate that through the community. I can tell you some of those conversations came from me doing nothing but asking asking the right question and sitting back and letting the community uh really just pour their hearts out. Yeah and just being supportive and sometimes it’s not even about you know one of the things that we talk about in our group is we don’t give advice but we offer a space to share and then the empathy component is something that we also offer of just um acknowledging whatever the experiences and then asking and then asking do you how can we support you best?

Like not giving them, here’s the answer, here’s I’m a like the great I am the great solver. I’ll tell you I spent a lot of my life telling everybody what to do and then like you know not doing, taking my own advice is what I needed to do and that could be hard. You know one of one of the hardest conversations I had actually recently I did a one on one coaching session with myself um and I realized I was having some really deep challenges with my own personal image, the the identity that I, you know that I felt or believed in internally wasn’t really being reflected externally and it was getting in the way of me being able to, you know, speak fully and freely and openly at times with those that I was looking to connect with and so you know, once it came out I found I found myself in tears, I was going back and forth just having a conversation with myself and I’m just picturing you like standing in front of a mirror and like having a deep conversation with yourself, like at the mirror something, I don’t know if that’s how it played out, but what I’m envisioning similar, I actually um I actually recorded it so that I could go back and review it um it’s, it’s out there on Youtube somewhere, but I saw it modeled before and I said man I need to make this a regular practice.

Um so with something that I spent a couple of minutes doing every week now on my sabbath, it’s just spending a few minutes talking to myself, what are the issues that I’m dealing with and um just to get them out of my head and to be honest to practice being fully sincere and honest with myself, you know, to, to show that I can be vulnerable with myself, which helps me to be vulnerable in front of others, you know, I don’t have it all together, I love saying that nowadays, I don’t have it all together, it’s not for me to have it all together, it’s for me to be comfortable, confident, consistent in who I am, you know, to show up, it’s not only the best version of myself today, which is gonna change tomorrow, but to consistently and continually be the authentic version of me and it’s been powerful in some of the communities. Um I’m a part of to be recognized for being authentically me. Mhm Yeah, exactly, because it’s, it can be really easy to fall into this hole, um especially when you’re an entrepreneur and trying to like, promote, there’s so many entrepreneur standards of, you know, like you should have the perfect website and there’s, you know, so many followers and like, you know, you’re not doing good and then there’s this whole, like, this whole like race to perfection and then we’re both, we’re all like, I’m exhausted about this trying to get to perfection thing, I still don’t have it figured out seven years later or whatever.

Um and I love the idea of letting go of the perfection and saying it’s okay and I’m not, I mean, if I had it all figured out then what else would I do? But like, I’m figuring it out right now as I go, and so I’m not, You know, I’m not perfect, I don’t have it all figured out, but I’m trying and practicing what I want to exhibit in my own life is really been and I lost my way with that in 2020. I really like, deviated from that and like lost my authenticity. Like I didn’t feel an alignment um with what I was doing, what I was speaking about and in my personal actions, what I was doing in my life. And so 2021 was really about me focusing on reconnecting to that and practicing it in my own life, because once you reconnect with and you could be showing up better as a host when you’re, when you’re hosting a community, you can show up so much better in such a better mood and, you know, like energy and all of that because you gave yourself that time in the morning or you know, you’re going to have that time at night or whatever the time is that you’ve set aside for yourself.

You know, you’ve either done that or you’re looking forward to that and so then you can share and become and be your best self because you’ve given yourself what you talked about. We’re gonna circle it back to the beginning of saying uh you know, prioritizing yourself paying yourself before others, which is what I love, Oh wonderful. I love how you close it out. So actually I wanted to ask you, I want to ask you a question if you don’t mind and you go for it alright, so thinking about your journey and I love to have fun, that is probably one of the nearest and dear things to me, I enjoy just creating, you know, an atmosphere of freedom of laughter, so I’m curious, can you recall any um one of the funnier moments in your journey and entrepreneurs as you were, you know, developing the identity or what you’re working through? Are there any any really funny moments that you can remember that kind of helped you along your journey?

You know, whatever that thought was, I want to hear it. Well, there’s like, well, first of all, the first thing I was thinking it was you’re gonna ask me about like, do I have fun in my life or something or like how do I implement fun, which is where I was thinking you were going because I just started a level three improv class. I’ve been taking improv over the last couple of years, so I just started A level three improv, which now means I’m a serious improviser apparently, but I feel like I’m not at all. So anybody listening who’s an improv expert, please do not. I’m not calling myself that, but so I started taking improv as part of my getting out of my comfort zone thing because I don’t like to be on stage as a, you know, a person, um I like to be an audience member and I but I like to laugh and so I found the improv really helped me um kind of get out of my shell and and things like that, and then and then you also said about laughter again, I was thinking I just did a laughter yoga class, which is another thing that I really wanted to implement in my life because I found it really helpful to join a community where they just show up on a zoom call and they just laughed because you know, as a person who’s an entrepreneur, I’m like having to show up and like being like whether I’m having a good day or a bad day, I’m like, I’ve got to just put the face, you know, whatever it is, I’m like okay, things are good unless it’s like somebody I personally know and then I’m like, no, today is not the greatest days, but in this, in this laughter yoga thing you just show up, you just show up and you laugh and then you say bye, and so I love that.

So those are the two things that I intentionally added in my life, because I was struggling with depression and anxiety in the last year, massive, massive depression and anxiety and so those are two things that I did for myself, but speaking of like a time when it was funny in my journey of like launching my consulting business and things like I tried so much, I put myself out there, which is what a lot of people say, which is how I got to like, where I am in doing this now, um because I just tried and I put myself out there, so there’s lots of funny videos of me, like on Youtube trying to like say things or like hosting events and I don’t, you know, I just, there’s a lot of stuff that I did that I’m like, I don’t know that that was the best idea, but I tried, I tried and I put myself out there and that was a brave thing to do when I didn’t really know what the heck I was doing, but I was just like, here’s an idea again with the vision that like, I’m a visionary person and I’m like, oh, I have this vision about this amazing community and there’s going to be all these people in it um and that was, that’s a great concept and it’s a great idea, but it takes a lot of time and effort to do and so over time, like, the funny thing is, is that I just learned that I have to purposely put funny into my life or else I continue to get back into this dead serious person and stressed out and anxiety ridden Deb that I don’t like that, I like the Deb who’s fun and engaging and interesting and likes to laugh and talk.

So, um I don’t know, there wasn’t a specific example in there, but I just gave a whole bunch of stuff, so oh I appreciate that and I ask that because that’s actually one of the pillars that I bring into the community. Uh, you know, we focus on, you know, faith and our fitness, which is a total fitness, you know, physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual and economic fitness as well as finances and family and friendships. But I really wanted to be intentional about making fun a part of everyone, like everyone, everyone’s life who came into my community. So for me, you know, it’s like one day a week, I want to have some kind of fun, right, one day a week, I have something cut out, um, you know, three months, I mean three days out of the month, you know, can be dedicated to some sort of leisure or fun our activity. And I just remember sometimes a couple of times doing the Foundation or the founding of having the greatness when It would be like these, these uh, these 14-day miracles are what we call them as someone would come into the community and after a week of showing up, they would start to see significant changes in their beliefs in life.

And then um by the end of the second week there was this great opportunity that Would show up in their life for this great, you know, revelation or something. Um, and so every time someone new came into the community, you know, it was, it was kind of a running joke, I was like, oh we got another 14 day miracle on the hands, but everybody really bought into it, you know, seeing others transform and wondering if they could be next, the person coming in, had no idea what was going on and so it’s not like we were making them the joke, but there would be so many, so much conversation about, oh maybe you, you don’t know what you’re getting into, but it’s going to be so amazing when it, when it arrives and uh it was just, it was exciting, it was always something to look for when we had new additions into the community said, hey, there could be another miracle, you know, in the next couple of weeks where somebody has a, you know, just a really breakthrough moment and it just brought joy to me along the journey because it started with me and then I was looking for someone else um but it wasn’t, it was unplanned, it was just something that, that showed itself as a pattern over time, right?

You don’t know organically happening, you don’t know when it’s gonna happen, you don’t know where, you don’t know how, you don’t know when, but eventually with the support of an amazing community and the relationships that you build in there, whatever community is, can create massive transformation and not just your life for a single person’s life, but also transformed groups and then you, there are communities that I will never leave because I’m but you know, I am going to be a part of that community in some way, shape or form because they’ve made such a massive impact on my life, right? So I think that’s the power that just goes back to like the power of accountability and showing up and you know, how that comes all together inside an online community and yeah, all that good stuff. Absolutely. So, I want to wrap up and I want to just ask, it sounds like you’ve got an amazing program. I know we didn’t talk about like the platform um that you’re on, like where you’re hosting this right now, but if you could share maybe where people can find out more about the program and let us know.

Absolutely. So, um you can find me have a link tree page with just a couple of different links under bo bae where a b O B B Y underscore world or you can find me a coach bakar on all social media platforms. Um I really like to, to connect with people, you know, one on one, you know, I’m putting content out and you know, just sharing a little bit of my philosophy with the communities, like even some testimonies, but I really like to to know that the people coming into the community are serious about making a change in their life, but also um really, really have a strong need for that community, you know, so many people out there are going out alone. So you can connect with me again on multiple platforms under coach built car. That’s coach underscore B A K A R and look forward to hearing from you LinkedIn is the best place on Instagram. Where Yeah, yeah, I’m on, I’m on all platforms.

You can find me on Tiktok Instagram LinkedIn and uh, in facebook working to build out the Youtube page. But I’ll be excited to see that similar. Oh, that sounds great. Well, I’m so glad you’re on here. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. Amazing experiences and how accountability can be such a massive, amazing way to build and grow a community. Thank you. Thank you. It’s been my pleasure. And I’m looking forward to connecting with a fine comb here because it sounds like the type of community that that suited for me to, you know, I need that kind of support, just like anyone else. Yeah, for sure. So, uh, thank you again. If anyone is interested, I will have show notes with um, his website, the linkedin, all that good stuff. And if you have questions for me, you can shoot me an email Deb at, find calm here dot com. I am going to be updating some website things. So keep an eye out for that. And until the next time I hope you’re finding calm in this day, evening, morning, afternoon, wherever it is, whenever it is for you find calm until the next time, take care and I’ll talk to you soon.

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